happened upon this...almost one year later!

so I believe in one of the first posts I professed that I am horrible and keeping up with things like blogging...case in point! Almost one year later, I am back.
I have begun to rely on Facebook, but need to remember it is still important to update this blog. Life passes by so quickly, but a blog is like a snapshot in time. Since we are in the digital age, now, might as well embrace it!
Carly is almost 5 and Karsen is almost 2, yikes, that is just craziness. I am starting to wonder if I want another child, which is a huge decision! Although many people tell me that the decisions from 1 to 2 is the biggest, b/c after that, what the heck, let's add another one in there~ well, not really, but you get the gist.
I still have time, not like I must decide NOW, but it is a big decision. Oh, well, like everything else, it is in God's hands :)

poem of love for valentine's day

i carry your heart with me ee cummings

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

New year, new goals, new me!

OK, how cliche is this... 'this is a new year and I'm going to change everything!' I don't want to be cliche but I do want to implement some new things in my life, like:
Take a day picture.
Work on organization
Attend church regularly
Start counseling

So far, I've done all four! Course it is only January 14...


But seriously, look at that beautiful family! I don't mind bragging, life is a challenge for me, so I need to be reminded of the good. Since starting counseling again, my counselor was saying that chronic pain literally zaps all energy from you. Um, yeah! But you know what? It's nice to hear someone else say it.

I will start posting my pics and keeping up with my resolutions.



Day 1, January 1, 2009
Good-bye Christmas mantle, hello spring! I love changing my mantle out, I got this from my mom, she always made an effort to change things up. I love putting u the holiday decor, but after a while, the tree is dropping needles and it just feels good to know spring is on the horizon (so lucky to live on the California coast!).













Day 2, January 2, 2009- It's all about standing up for Karsen! He's grown so confident and loves to pull himself up to anything he can get to. Specifically, he loves the Leap Frog Learning Table. The baby-proofing is near completion, although, you think you have it all done and then you realize there's some other danger lurking around the corner!





Day 3, January 3, 2009
Seriously, I feel like laundry is my arch nemesis. Just when you get it done, BOOM! It all starts
back up again. I don't mind doing laundry, or folding, it is the putting away that gets to me. Not sure why, but as I type this I have a dinner table stacked to the beams (ok, slight exaggeration) with laundry, grrr....




OK, Karsen is sleeping on my bed and it's time for some cuddle time. More tomorrow :)

9/11 poem; WHERE WAS GOD IN ALL OF THIS?

WHERE WAS GOD IN ALL OF THIS? First of all, God was trying to discourage anyone from taking this flight. Those four flights together held over 1000 passengers and there was only 266 aboard. God was on 4 commercial flights giving terrified passengers the ability to stay calm. Not one of the family members who was called by a loved one on one of the high-jacked planes said that passengers were screaming in the background. On one of the flights God was giving strength to passengers to try toovertake the highjackers. God was busy trying to create obstacles for employees at the World Trade Center. After all only around 20,000 were at the towers when the first jet hit. Since the buildings hold over 50,000 workers, this was a miracle in itself. How many of the people who were employed at the WTC told the media that they were late for work or they had traffic delays? God was holding up 2-110 story buildings so that 2/3 of the workers could get out. It was so amazing that the top of the towers didn't topple when the jets impacted. God was in the rescue workers who were running into the buildings as most people were running out. God was in the flight attendant who called her husband as her plane was being hijacked to tell him that she loved him. God was in the two men who carried a wheelchair-bound woman down 70 flights of stairs to safety. God was in the people who stood bleeding, in line to give blood. God was in the strangers in cars, picking up strangers stranded in the city and taking them home to their families. God is in the people who are begging to volunteer, to do anything to help. God is in the thousands, if not millions who are flooding blood banks thousands of miles away to help people they have never met. God is in the people who are comforting someone even when they don't know what to say. God is in the people who watched and cried for people who may remain anonymous in name, but never in their sacrifice. God is in my neighborhood where I see flags waving from every home. God is in the men and women, looking at 110 stories of rubble, and seeing only the opportunity to find survivors. God is with the heroes, most of whom will never be on the news, whose stories will only be told to their closest friends and family; but who saved someone's mother, father, sister, brother, daughter, son, husband,wife, grandmother, grandfather, aunt, uncle, cousin, lover, colleague, acquaintance, teacher, mentor or friend with a single act of kindness, compassion and bravery. God was not in the hearts of the people that caused these inhumane events. However, God was indeed there, where he was needed the most. -Author Unknown-

this is my new mantra...

nuf said!

nothing better than a baby's laughter....

tonight I laid in bed with karsen after a hectic day and sang a new song I wrote for him. he lit up like a christmas tree... honestly, grinned from ear to ear and then... for the first time... he laughed. deep down, belly laugh. I used my chin on his neck and chest area and sort of nuzzled him... he melted. oooh, karsen is going to be a sensitive little softy, I can just tell.
sooo excited to finally be reading my book on 'the spirited child'. just a nice way of saying 'your little hellion'! it's just, i'm realizing now that i was making classic mistakes, and now i'm aware and find myself looking over myself and observing me. one of the main things is getting back to time outs. and giving positive praise out of the blue, not sandwiching it between criticism, just good 'ol positive praise. well, she ate it up with a spoon! she was so happy to be told i was proud of her and she was she good at getting on the potty all by herself, and getting dressed, and buckling herself in the carseat, etc. this was all while eating an orange popsicle. she had just woken up from a nap, but she grinned from ear to ear.
there is so much love in this house...

This time is for real...

ok, truth be told, I have started multiple blogs. the reason I have not kept up with it? forgot my password..... pretty stupid I know. but that's what happens when you have kids- they turn your brain to mush. but now, this is saved as a favorite, so I have no excuse!
few things this blog will be used for:

1. record important events, post pics, etc. for my family/friends and for me to remember these beautiful, crazy, hectic times.
   
2. post my scrapbook, altered art in hopes of one day being published
3. since I am awful at journlaling in my notebook maybeI can be more diligent about this.
4. lastly I have seen the early signs of some mild post partum.... I don't want to be on anti-depressants. I want to be proactive and open up about all this. being a mom to two kids is a challenge and I am proud of myself and all my accomplishments!